Dumb-Dumb Human and a Newborn Dryad

Cao Mao stopped harvesting crops and stared at the new item, the spirit wooden corn.

'What will happen if I eat this, my dear system?'

Ding

You'll die instantly.

Cao Mao chuckled. He had expected this cold answer.

'What if I eat it in the isolation space? Will I gain something when I respawn?'

Ding

You'll gain the digested energy, and your dantian will be adapted to the wooden element.

But before that, you'll repeatedly die until your body builds enough resistance.

'How many times will I die?'

Ding

By my calculation, you'll die 2,236 times before you can digest a strand of wooden element Qi. You'll die a total of 2,539,466 times before you can digest all energy from a piece of a wooden corn kernel. If you're stupid enough to eat the entire ear, you have to multiply the number by 781.

That was not a piece of good news. If he took a shortcut by eating a piece of this corn, Cao Mao might lose his sanity before he could use the wooden element Qi.

'Let me change the question. Will I experience something if I hold it in my hands for too long?'

Ding

You'll die.

Cao Mao hugged his chest and nodded while his face revealed a sarcastic smile. Yup, this thing was too dangerous. He would never bring it out of his system inventory for the time being, but he would consult it with Ju Shoufen later. There should be a way to turn these wooden corns into pills, so he could consume them without a backlash.

Also, wooden corns and spirit corns looked the same, and they had the same smell. Therefore, Cao Mao vowed that he would not eat any spirit corn without identifying it first.

Still, that didn't discourage Cao Mao from harvesting more crops.

Getting more enthusiastic than before, Cao Mao ran through the cornfield to see if there were any hidden wooden corns.

Going through the field for 10 minutes, he found 50 more wooden spirit corn ears. He hummed in delight as he planned to exchange some of them to Ju Shoufen for a load of CP points or spirit stones.

But as Cao Mao was running in the cornfield, he bumped into someone. That person's head slammed onto Cao Mao's crotch.

The running man was stunned. He crouched down and held his golden balls in pain.

"Ow! Watch where you're going!"

An angry girl's voice came from below. The teenage girl was holding her head with her vine arms while she glared at Cao Mao. Her eyes were brimming with tears of pain.

The naked dryad teenager, who looked to be a high-schooler's age, was sitting in the cornfield. Her cultivation base was almost non-existence, a level 1 of 1st-stage. She was in the middle of extracting a corn ear from a corn stalk, but Cao Mao ran into her.

When Cao Mao recovered from the pain, he finally noticed the little girl's features. However, his father's instinct didn't awaken. Something else did.

"Excuse me. How old are you?" Cao Mao's face was solemn. His intention was clear.

"You're a rude human! How dare you question this lady's age!? I'm old enough to be your grandmother, you dumb-dumb!"

The dryad stood up, showing her true height. From a glance, Cao Mao believed she should be around 160 to 165cm tall, but her hips and breasts were still underdeveloped.

"How old, then? I'm 61 in a few months."

"Pfft, that's cute. I'm 1500 years old this year!"

"Wow, amazing!" Cao Mao's eyes were sparkling. He rubbed his hands as if he was looking forward to devouring his tasty meal.

"That's right! Do you understand my greatness now, you dumb-dumb human!?"

The dryad puffed her naked chest, revealing her C-cup and her perky nipples. She didn't even care that her lower part was visible, too.

However, her proud smile froze when she noticed that Cao Mao slowly took off his pants.

"What are you doing?"

Cao Mao smiled, "Nothing. I'm just worried about you. You don't have any cloth to wear, so you must be cold. I'm planning to give you my clothes."

The dryad widened her eyes and nodded in approval, "You're quite considerate for a dumb-dumb human. Very well, I shall take your offer, even though I don't need your clothes."

"Say, great senior, do you know that a human's body is warm?"

"My mama said they're warm when they're alive. Why?"

"Do you know that when you're hugging a human without clothes, you'll feel his warmth?"

"Really?"

"Try me. The weather is quite cold here. You'll feel warmer with me."

"Haha! Sure. You dumb-dumb human are quite nice."

The dryad didn't notice the erected meat. She jumped into his arms and hugged him. The dryad's legs were the same as tree roots. Yet, they separated into two main legs. Thus, Cao Mao didn't have a problem making those tree roots hugging his waist.

"Wow. You're warm! Your chest is firm, too. But something very hot is poking my butt…"

"Do you like it?"

"It feels nice. I like you dumb-dumb human now!"

Cao Mao warmly smiled in front of the little dryad girl, but his smile turned into Light Yagami's sneer after the girl couldn't see his face.

Cao Mao gently lowered the girl's body while his meat was pointing upward, slowly slipping into the glory hole.

Before the meat could enter the hole, a pair of fangs sunk into his shoulder.

Chomp

This dryad was no herbivore. She bit Cao Mao and started sucking his blood.

"YOU!!"

Cao Mao was angry for being stupid again. He forgot Xin Pi's warning that dryads fed on human flesh and blood, but he let his guard down because she was a lot weaker than him.

Gulp

Gulp

After drinking two mouthfuls of Cao Mao's blood, the dryad's cultivation base soared. Within a few seconds, she reached level 10. She might break through to the 2nd stage soon.

Sensing the danger, Cao Mao yanked the dryad's mouth away from him.

Unfortunately, the dryad's fangs were not her only weapon. Her vine arms revealed their tiny sharp tips, and they pierced Cao Mao's back. These tiny vines swum into his blood veins, taking in more juice.

Having enough of this, Cao Mao enveloped himself with yang fire.

"GET OFF ME!!"

The fire burned the tiny vines, the dryad's arms, and legs.

Like an innocent child, the dryad wailed in pain and let go of Cao Mao.

"It hurts! It hurts! Mama!"

Cao Mao had already summoned Killer Queen and was about to chop her head off. But after hearing the painful cry, he stopped.

Cao Mao might be ruthless at times, but he never killed children and women, unless they were clones in the isolated space. Hurting a harmless girl already left a bad taste in his mouth. Had he killed her, he would have had PTSD nightmares for years.

Feeling guilty, Cao Mao canceled his yang fire and sheathed KQ. The fire disappeared from the dryad's body, but she was still wailing in pain.

"Waaa! Mama!"

Cao Mao knelt before the dryad and gave her three low-grade healing pills.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. Here, eat these pills, and the pain will go away, okay?"

"Waaa!!"

The dryad continued crying. Her voice got louder every second.

Since apologizing and talking wasn't enough. Cao Mao forcefully shoved the three pills down the dryad's mouth.

After the pills entered her stomach, the burnt wounds on her vine arms and legs disappeared.

Sensing that the pain was gone, the little girl stopped crying, but she was still sobbing.

"Hic-Humans are-Hic-dumb-dumb bullies! Hic-I hate you!"

Cao Mao couldn't retort. Everything was his fault because he tried to violate this maiden. Taking responsibility, he gave some of his clothes to the girl while he put on clothes. Cao Mao abandoned the lewd thought.

"I'm so sorry. You suddenly bit me, so I got a little panicked. Say, do you like wooden corns?"

Despite the risk of being infected by wooden Qi, Cao Mao took out an ear of wooden spirit corn from his inventory and flashed it in front of the dryad.

It worked like magic. The dryad's sobbing stopped. She stared at the corn as if she were a cat staring at a roasted fish, drooling.

Cao Mao tossed the corn to the sky. The dryad opened her mouth and caught it the same way a dog caught a Frisbee disk.

Seeing the little dryad chewing the wooden corn in glee, Cao Mao heaved a sigh of relief. He patted her head, gesturing another apology before he left her alone with two more wooden corn ears.

There was a reason why Cao Mao had to leave her alone. Xin Pi had unveiled some of the alchemists' dirty secrets.

The Myriad Cauldron Sect had a non-aggression pact with the dryad queen. The disciples and designated guests of the sect would not harm any member of the dryad clan. Vice Versa, dryads would not harm or kill the sect's disciples and guests in this Botany Plane. Aside from those conditions, human cultivators wouldn't be able to harm each other, but battles between outsiders and dryads were possible.

In this case, both Cao Mao and the little dryad violated the pact. It most mostly Cao Mao's fault since he seduced her, and she bit him because of her natural instinct. Fortunately, he wasn't kicked out of the plane yet.

'I should leave before her mama sees me. I'll be screwed if the dryads found out about my stupid deed.'

Walking away for 10 minutes, Cao Mao looked back if someone followed him. There was nobody behind him. He took a deep breath, telling himself that he had done the right thing.

After confirming his safety, Cao Mao continued to loot everything he had touched.

But after walking for 10 minutes, the previous dryad appeared in front of him. However, she was loosely wearing the robes that he had given her.

"Dumb-dumb human! Do you have another wooden corn?"

The dryad opened her vine arms upward like a beggar, asking for more donations.

Cao Mao was shocked and looked back by reflex. He was sure that he had walked in a straight line, and the girl was behind him.

"How did you get in front of me?"

"You dumb-dumb human is stupid. I can go anywhere I want! Now, gimme more wooden corn, or I'll tell my mama you bullied me!"

Now, the girl blackmailed him. Cao Mao wanted to get angry, but he couldn't.

"Haiya, you little monster is too cunning. Can't you harvest your own wooden corn?"

"Corns look the same everywhere. How should I know which one is wooden corn? You're a dumb-dumb!"

"So, you can't differentiate between spirit corns and wooden spirit corns?"

The dryad paused for a moment. Her face reddened in embarrassment while she retorted in anger, "It's you dumb-dumb human's fault! The corn stalks are too high, and every ear looks the same! You dumb-dumb human should have painted the corns or put a signboard! The cornfields are confusing!"

Cao Mao giggled as he found the little girl adorable. He passed another wooden corn to her.

The dryad snatched it from Cao Mao's hand and started chewing it raw.

Now that Cao Mao got to inspect her strength again, the girl had reached level 5 of the 2nd-stage. Her progress was scary. Yet, it baffled him that she had been living for over a thousand years, but her strength remained at the initial 1st stage.

"Say, little girl."

"I'm busy eating. Unless you want to give me another wooden corn, go away!"

"Hahaha. Well, I'm curious. Where do you live?"

The girl pointed at the forest beyond the humongous dome barrier, "There."

"Where is your mother?"

"Over there," The girl pointed at the same location.

"What have you been doing during these 1500 years?"

"Sunbath, eat, sleep, and more sunbath. When I realize it, I can already walk and move around, so I follow the sweet smell here."

"…"

In other words, she might have been a tree or a plant, who had just evolved into a dryad.

"I have an idea. Dumb-dumb human, carry me home! Give me another wooden corn, too!"

"Haiya, you're a selfish monster. Didn't your mother teach you about consideration and manner?"

"That's why you're dumb-dumb! I want to repay your kindness for these corns, so I want to introduce you to my kins! Bring me there, or I'll tell my mama you bullied me!"

Cao Mao scratched his head. Dealing with spoiled women could be handy, but he wanted to repent for his mistake. Therefore, Cao Mao complied with her orders for now.

"Alright! I'll take you there. Don't bite me again, okay?"

"Meh, fine. But I want 10 more wooden corns!"

Cao Mao internally cried. At this rate, this dryad would rob all of his wooden corns.